I'm wallowing in non-productiveness, and sadly, I'm kind of enjoying it. But then again, why is that so sad? Why is everyone so obsessed with efficiency? Humans are hardly even efficiently made creatures. Just take a look at us...

See what I mean?

I've been so engrossed in a number events, interviews, tests etc. I'd like to say that my life has been exciting, but who am I kidding? Who are we kidding?

Whether we blog about our lives or retell them to our friends and family, the truth is, the everyday person has a pretty mundane life. When you measure your life in teaspoons or whatever utensil you choose, chances are, there's little chance of finding an elephant in your soup staring you in the eye. I'm not saying that there's not point to life - quite the contrary. I advocate looking at the BIG picture.

I like to look at the Gestalt.

Summing up the parts.

The holistic approach.

At least for now.

I don't mean to be cynical today, but I'll write this blog in the hopes that maybe someone will look at it in its entirety, and find some meaning in it or a lack thereof. I'm no sage. Just a small fry in a happy meal. Speaking of small fries...

I realized that I am incredibly lucky.

I realized that I am part of a family that has come a long way, and that things won't necessarily be easier, but I'll have the strength to get through whatever obstacles get in my way.

My parents each had seven siblings. Dad lived in the slums of Manila, while mom lived in a rural fishing town. None of their parents went to college, but their children's education was a major priority for them.

Before my dad was born, his family's home was set ablaze and they were to start from square one with 4 children. By the time my dad finished school, he decided to immigrate to Canada. He only had less than $200 in his pocket and his education - from there, he and my mother scrimped and saved.

When things get rough, you find help in times and places you don't expect to.

I think I'm starting to see that help is on the way, as long as I try to help myself.